Mockstrocity Tour 17
Black Cat, D.C.
Friday March 31, 2017
I learned at an early age the meaning of parody and tribute. Merriam-Webster describes parody as “a literary or musical work in which the style of an author or work is closely imitated for comic effect or in ridicule,” and the definition of tribute is “a gift or service showing respect, gratitude, or affection.” So, when musical acts blend those terms, sometimes nightmare is the result. Again from Merriam-Webster, the definition is of a nightmare, “a frightening dream that usually awakens the sleeper.” The Mockstrocity Tour did that.
The terms can be melded into one scenario very quickly when the creators let their imagination run rampant. What was witnessed this past week can be described as nothing less than a freakish. “Would you like to COMBO that?”
I took a new friend, E.D., one of the female vocalists for Non-Fiction: A Tribute to The Black Crowes. I had pumped her up for Metalachi, as I had seen them in Texas and locally, in Lancaster, PA. We played their first CD in my truck on the hour plus ride to the Logan Circle area of D.C. Their first release, UNO, has been in the hands of fans since 2012 along with the long overdue follow-up, DOS, in late 2016. Yet, our conversation later told more. She said, “There was nothing you can do to fully prepare for a Metalachi show.”
Her main desire was to see Mac Sabbath, the internationally acclaimed band that “Super-twisted-sizes” the lyrics of Black Sabbath. With Songs like “N.I.B.B.L.E.,” “Frying Pan,” and “Sweet Beef,” the band makes certain you never want to eat at the Golden Arches again.
Black Cat is a super-cool bar that attracts people from many different walks of life. The bar is complete with a mini-theater, multiple pinball machines, and a small café that serves both vegetarian and meat-based dishes. Although, you should be prepared, the bar is cash only.
Ned Flanders, the uber-sweet neighbor of Homer Simpson has a tribute band called Okilly Dokilly. If you know anything about Ned and his personality, then this band will send you into a tail spin. WTF?! The five-piece band all clad in typical Ned Flanders glasses, khakis, and polo shirt will totally change your way of thinking to the detested neighbor on The Simpsons TV show. The songs, ranging from “White Wine Spritzer” and “Godspeed Little Doodle” to “You’re A Jerk” and “Donut Hell,” are enough to have you wish Matt Groenig had included them in his popular show. Prior to witnessing this band, memorize the lyrics so you can sing along.
My friends from Los Angeles, California, Metalachi, are on tour supporting their new release, DOS. The new track mix is enough to make your ears bleed. “Symphony of Destruction,” “Ace of Spades,” “Raining Blood,” and “Cemetery Gates” are filled with the flavor of old Mexico, or at least, East L.A.
There are rumors that Maximillian “Dirty” Sanchez had been deported back to his mother’s country, the band played on with their seester, Queen Kyla Vera. Don’t be misled by her tiny stature and purple electric violin. She shreds, and although Max held his own onstage, the crowd went nuts when Kyla launched into her solos.
If you have not experienced a mariachi band in person, you need to understand the depth of instruments used. The violin, trumpets, and unique guitarrón mexicano, add in the “Hype Dude,” Warren Moscow, and you have the makings of a party.
The intensity of the music will take you to an altered world of reality. You can never know who will be at a Metalachi show. Watch out behind you, it is Nacho Libre.
The stage is sexualized by a multitude of bras hanging from mic stands. Vega (Vocals) and El Cucuy (horns) banter back and forth about the females in the audience, often inviting them up to the stage for tequila shots.
See Photos from the Lancaster, PA show on Dec 16, 2016.
Cinnabon Jovi, Dokken Donuts, Twisted Sizzler, Pantera Bread have nothing on Mac Sabbath.
“Eat and drink and enjoy life. Where you don’t need a fork or knife” -Pair-a-Buns
Join Ronald Osbourne, Slayer MacCheeze, Grimalice and Catburglar as they romp through the “fast food drive-thru lane” of life’s most terrifying nightmares. If you occasionally enjoyed a Big Mac or McNuggets at your local Golden Arches, you may think twice after seeing these frightening costumed characters. Just what are they doing to my food back there?
This is the most interesting band I have seen in my life. Tight, fun, and so twisted you can’t help but want to sing along with the words portraying the perils of fast food. The lyrics detail the worst aspects of this culture of over-commercialization and genetically modified foods. What’s that? Pink slime, but it tastes so good.
“Sweet Beef,” “More Ribs,” “Chicken for the Slaves,” and “Frying Pan,” the list goes on with parody after parody of Black Sabbath songs. The stage was filled with props and a multi-media onslaught of out-of-this-world fast food disasters. Inflatable hamburgers, giant straws, and over-sized condiment bottles add to the fun atmosphere of their shows. Let’s not forget the “Drive Thru Guy;” such an uninspired bloke as I ever met. I am certain he is destined to work this minimum wage job till he dies of complications from a diabetic coma brought on by the overconsumption of mega-sized Cokes; but, as uninterested in his job as he is, he excels at holding the cowbell during “Lord of the Swirl.”
Prep for this show? Yes. Stuff yourself on the Number 6 meal and, of course, supersize it. Let the smell of the fries linger in your nostrils as you feel your heart trying to keep your arteries clear. That adrenaline will get you psyched for this, the headlining act of the Mockstrocity Tour ’17.